The Best Way to Deliver Bad News

Bad news calls for human contact, whether it’s a complication, a negative decision, an illness, or even leaving for a new job.

The gold standard: meeting in person. Next best: making a phone or video call.

A real-time conversation gives the other person space to absorb the nuances of what you’re saying. They can ask questions to clarify. You can acknowledge that this is not what you’d both hoped for. You can talk about next steps.

For both the person sharing the news and the person receiving it, a conversation feels more complete.

So why are we so hesitant to meet that person or make that call?

As humans, we’re naturally lazy. We think it will be easier to send a quick email or text.

Don’t trust that initial lazy instinct. Your quick email or text may push the issue off your plate. For now.

The person receiving it suddenly has to deal with it — alone. Their stress might make them seize on certain words or misunderstand key parts of your message.

Before you know it, the typing will be fast and furious, without the resolution you could get in a conversation.

As humans, we were designed for rich, complex social interactions. A spoken conversation — even a difficult one — feels more fulfilling because it is. It shows you care and want to support the other person. That builds professional relationships.

From a purely business perspective, conversations are also more efficient because they save time. You can sort out an immense amount as you respond to each other in real time and make a plan together.

If you’re more advanced in your career, help change the culture and lead by example. Call that younger colleague into your office or stop them in the hall. They will get used to your impromptu conversations. Eventually, they’ll see the benefits of using conversations themselves instead of trusting that initial lazy instinct to type.